How I Organize my Chaos

I have a problem. Me.

Ever since the break-up, I have been in disarray. I have been trying to get focused and sorted but it falls flat. Creating a schedule has helped me quite a bit to stay focused and push out the paralysis that comes with depression. The Prozac totally helps with that too! I keep refining my process to find a better way – a more efficient way – of creating my schedule without losing the interest. After a couple tries, I think I found it! Yay me.

One thing I have found is that writing something down – as opposed to typing it in a computer – makes me remember it better. I’m an artist since as far back as I can remember. I love the action of writing, the feel of pens and pencils, and the smell of graphite and ink. I get a pack of lined, college-ruled paper from the dollar store, like 100 sheets. I fold the paper in half and on the left side of the red margin line, I write in 30-minute blocks.  I put the date and day at the top. On the right of the fold, I list my goals.

I’m going to change that from ‘goals’ to ‘My true self’ because it’s not about the destination, but about the evolution to become who I feel is my truest version of myself.

Below that on the right side, I make a couple groupings:

  1. Reminders – things that are coming up that I need to keep in mind.
  2. To Do – at least 1 task for each goal that I have listed above.
  3. Blog – the things I want to get completed for my blog.
  4. Meditation – things I want to do simply to find out more about my truest self.

Let me break that down a little bit. My True Self has five things on it, but the more I examine and journey into myself, the more I find out that they are each inter-twined. I’m Rockabilly. That’s me. I’ve been that way since before I was 10 years old. However with the depression the last couple years, I list it on here to remind me of who I am and that it’s okay for me to make the effort to feel like me, no matter what anyone else says. But with being rockabilly, I want to get back my hour-glass figure (enter the goal of 150 pounds). My company, Swingin’ Dolly Events, is based on and centered around my passion for retro/ vintage/ mid-century concepts and design. My desire to move to Hawaii isn’t just to be near a beach – I live in Southern California, I’m already near a beach – but Hawaii has its environment that is timeless. So while each of my true self items are separate, they are also deeply connected.

That means, my ‘to do list’ may not be very long because those things benefit more than one of my true self points.

Onto the left side of the paper. Going by time, I enter the things that HAVE to get done at specific times. For example, at 8 am, we HAVE to leave for school in order for the kids to get there on time. That also means at 7 am, I have to get up. And that means at 430 pm, I have to pick up the kids from care.

During the day, there are other constants like lunch time, Cleaning Info Pic time, and when I need to run errands.

Then I look into the blank space that I have left over. In those spaces is where I schedule my To Do List things. I know the baby likes to watch her shows that come on from 10am to 12pm, so that’s when I schedule my art time because I can’t focus if I’m entertaining a baby. General postings can happen at any time because I mainly do those from my phone.

One of the things I have incorporated into my day is logging my food. I used to be on Weight Watchers (If I could afford it, I would be on it today because it WORKS), and the single biggest thing that made a difference in my weight journey was logging my food. Even if it was to just understand exactly how much I am mindlessly eating. So on the back of the paper, at the top, is my food log. I list a couple major points:

  1. what time i eat
  2. what I ate
  3. how I was feeling at the time
  4. the calories I took in
  5. the calorie balance I have left

My intension is to eliminate carbs all together but I keep running out of food money each month, so while I work on getting that stablized, I am starting at 1800 calories a day to be at 1200 calories a day by Halloween.

On the back is where I would also list my workout information. Today is a cardio day so I didn’t really put too much on there. I’ll do my little video and list it with how hard (on a scale from 1-10) that I worked out. I have a FitBit heart rate monitor so I’ll put my heart rate on there too.

If it was a weight training day, I would have a little chart and shit so I can record everything. That way I know what I need to beat for the next time.

So that’s the starting lay out. It seems a little complex but it really isn’t. And it takes me about 10 minutes to have it done every night for the next day. Then I have a guide of how my day should unfold.

I keep my list out all day. Frankly, I keep all my lists out all day. LOL I’m a Lister, I admit it. I have a 3-ring binder that is my daily schedules etc that help me through the day. It’s my bullet journal and it keeps me focused. I just tote it around with me all day to make sure I get done what I wanted to in order to become a truer version of myself. I have an archive binder that I keep my daily lists in for record and reference. Why make all these lists if I don’t do anything with the collected data? I review the data and make adjustments that will make my day more efficient and to spot trends.

And yes, I have a chart for that too.

I like to keep track of my feelings and performance so I can gauge my depression efforts and to prepare myself for any bad-horomone days. If I see a pattern of days where I can’t seem to do anything, I can ‘predict’ the next occurance and put things in place either to counteract the effect or to comfort and accept the effect. If I know that every 3rd week I get zapped of energy and can’t get out of bed, then I will make sure to have what I need done completed so I can rest when my body wants to.

If I see that I get migraines at specific times of month or specific weather, then I can prepare in order to minimize the suffering.

Also, I am able to communicate better with my doctor when we discuss how to improve my health. I put it on graph paper and then once the graph is filled up, I transfer it to an excel spread sheet – makes it faster when I want to analyze the data.

I should’ve told you in the beginning: I am a total nerd.

I’m working on creating a printable version of this if you’re interested. I prefer to actually write on paper but if you would like, I will make one in an excel spread sheet too. Once those are complete, I’ll post it for everyone.

Thank you again for reading my blog! I’m trying to raise funds for my kids’ trip and would really appreciate it if you could contribute. If you can’t, please share my posts so maybe someone else will be able to help out. Thank you again!


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Project Mama

Just me.

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