Co-parenting a bday party

I want to tell everyone that when you don’t communicate well with your kids’ father, shit sucks.

I try not to ask him for anything. Like at all. I haven’t been working, I have a minimal income and even am on food stamps for groceries. I want to be able to have my kids enjoy their birthdays though.

You KNOW it was KICK ASS. ​

I had tot get a little creative when it came to the entertainment of the party. Normally, I would just rent a bouncer and be done with it. This time I opted to have my kid’s birthday at my ma’s, who has a pool in her backyard. It helped too that her birthday was going to have 100+ degree weather.

If you’ve been reading my blog at all, you KNOW I have a deep love for Hawaii and Polynesian culture. I have been collecting vintage and retro things since I was 19 (I’m not telling you how long ago that was), so I was able to turn this into a hawaiian party pretty cheaply.

The raffia that I used on the tables and things I already had. I would buy them when Party City starts the summer stuff sales. I usually clean up there. And the lilies there on the table were a Michael’s on-sale buy. 🙂

What’s a pool party without a hawaiian coconut bra?

Here’s another table with the raffia. The little jars are actually cleaned out salsa jars, spray-painted lids, with small shells in the bottom. On top of the shells is a battery operated candle and a drink umbrella on top of that. It looks so cute!

Some more raffia because that table wouldn’t even scrub clean…..

Way hot out, I put out a pot filled with my parasols (vintage, remember?) for people to use who needed shade. They came in real handy. I don’t have a picture of it but I also had a bowl  in the walkway that had waterproof sunscreen in it. 🙂

Balloons! Latex free – my middle daughter is allergic.

Here’s the pool. Filled it with rafts my ma already had. She did buy 2 new umbrellas just to make sure there was enough shade.

More raffia….

My older sister filled up like 200 water balloons for the kids to toss around. It was great fun for everyone… until we saw the dogs trying to eat them. After cleaning that up, we decided no more water balloons.

We had out about 5 life jackets just in case there were kids who needed them.

My oldest doesn’t like chocolate (I know, right?) so instead of chocolate candies, we do rice krispie treats. No, I do not make them. I buy the big pack of them, take them out, stick them in baggies (that I already had) and tie them with a nice ribbon. I got everyone fooled. 😉

What? I like pineapple…. This isn’t just about her!

They had a great time.

We must have had 40 people there and 15 or 20 of them kids swimming in the pool.

At dusk, we lit a bunch of floating candles in the pool. This is a little misdirection: My ma blew a fuse in the pool electric box so there was no light in the poor or spa that worked. No one knew the difference. 🙂 Sneaky!

All in all, it was a great time. However, I did it alone. There are no friends who come over to help – even when they say things like, “Just let me know when you need help, I’ll be there!” I have determined that’s just a polite lie. My ma did a lot. My older sister did a lot. I got no help from their dad. I packed everything up plus all 3 kids the day before and headed to my ma’s. I cleaned that day, and the morning of the party. He showed up over an hour late and he was supposed to bring the ice – so all the drinks were hot. Then he didn’t help cook the hot dogs or help entertain or refill anything. He didn’t help clean up and left with 2 of the kids. I stayed the night to help clean up, spent most of the following day cleaning up, get back to the house to a DISASTER of a house only to spend the time I wanted to rest with, cleaning that fucking mess.

Same shit when I got back from Hawaii – I had all 3 kids with me, I get in at like 10:30 pm and the house was a FUCKING PIG PEN! What the bloody fuck?!

Anyway, that’s what happens when you allow it. You better believe that if you allow someone to treat you like shit, it’s going to continue until YOU stop it. Don’t be fooled: THEY will never change.

Thank you so much for reading my blog! It’s your support that keeps me chasing my passions and writing about it. With your contributions, you’re helping me pursue not only my true self, but 25% of the funds raised are donated to the SurfRider Foundation. It’s the small contributions that will also help fund the next trip to Hawaii in October 2017 as so to start connecting to our future there. Thank you all again so very much!


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Project Mama

Just me.

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